Fun things to do after hours at the office when you’re hungry:
1) Grab two space heaters and place them on the floor, facing one another.
2) Find a random metal rod on a nearby desk that may or may not be used to itch someone’s butt.
3) Procure leftover ghost-shaped Halloween marshmallows from the candy bowl at the reception desk. (Note that though marshmallows are orange and brown and may appear to be flavored, they are, in fact, just like white marshmallows.)
4) Stab the leftover ghost-shaped Halloween marshmallows with the random metal rod.
5) Hold the marshmallows between the opposing heaters for ten minutes.
6) Grow anxious and pop the metal grate off of one heater so as to get the marshmallows closer to the heat source.
7) Rejoice as the marshmallows actually brown within moments.
8.) Steal a package of totally-savory-and-not-at-all-appropriate-for-s’mores Melba toast off of a co-worker’s desk in the absence of graham crackers.
9) Melt a Tootsie Roll in the microwave in the absence of a chocolate bar.
10) Top Melta toast with Tootsie Roll and heater-browned marshmallow.
11) Savor your fake s’more like nobody’s ever savored a fake s’more before.
12) Feel a little bit bad about yourself for being pathetic.
13) But mostly just feel awesome.